I was raised up in church, which my Daddy never went. It was a good childhood. I can’t fault them for anything because my raisers were good. It was good intentions. Seeing my dad drinking made it hard for me not to follow in his footsteps. It was just something I enjoyed doing and so I followed in his footsteps anyway. Now here I am.
I was working for the State. I worked for the Department of Public Instruction in Raleigh, then i worked for the Department of Transportation. I would go, I would sober up, and get a job. I would stay sober for three years or something like that; then i would start dabbing in again. I would take my problems to work as far as going to the bathroom and snorting cocaine. It all began again and I lost my job. It got to the point where I just couldn’t keep a job. For the last 20 years I haven’t really done anything, but drink and drug.
I was at the Mission once before, but I was not going to abide by the rules at all. I had my own rules. I didn’t last very long because I got written up all the time. So, I did what I’ve always done. I ran. I left again. I went straight back to what I had been doing—drinking and drugging again. I don’t know exactly how long I was gone this time. It was probably six months or so.
Then I started getting sick. I just could not hold my alcohol. I knew something was wrong with me, but I continued to drink because I thought it would make me feel better. It didn’t! So I went to detox and this time it was to make it work. Because I knew that I could not have done it by myself; I didn’t know where to start. It had been so long since I’d been sober that I had no clue how to get a job, or even how to talk to people.
When I first started the victory program I was so nervous about everything, but those six months went by so fast. You learn so much in those classes. A whole lot more than what I’d thought it was going to be. I’m a little nervous about getting back out in the world once this is over. It seems like the Lord has worked for me so much. Things have fallen in my way.
For the near future I plan to be here. I don’t plan to g out there and work. I really enjoy what I’m doing here; the environment is really great. And I believe I will make is as long as I stick with the family I’ve got here.
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